Why can't Microsoft play nice?

Last semester I had some problems with Outlook and syncing my calendar with my phone. I was fine with it at the time because I didn't have much variation in my day to day schedule and I could deal without Outlook, but with the fall semester starting here soon I figured I'd better figure out the whole syncing issue. While I was at it I thought I'd look into other calender programs to see if there would be something out there I liked better. In fact I like so many other programs better than Outlook because I don't need all the big business stuff that Outlook has in it...I just needed something that would sync with my phone. But then that made me remember why I had to go with Outlook in the first place. It is the only thing that will sync with my phone.

Vista comes with a mail program (Windows Mail) that is pretty decent, an address book program (Windows Contacts) and a calendar program (Windows Calendar) that I could use. The problem being that in order to sync with my phone I first had to download and install the Active Sync for Vista, Windows Mobile Device Center. Upon downloading that I found out that I needed Windows Mobile 6 in order to be able to sync with the mobile device center. After finding a download for that and installing it on my phone (by the way, up to this point this all took about 9 months from the point at which I got my computer with Vista) I connected up to my computer to sync my contacts, etc. and Windows Mail, Contacts, and Calendar, don't sync with Windows Mobile Device Center...they don't sync at all. Apparently you have to use Outlook in order for your "Microsoft phone" to sync with your "Microsoft computer" with the "Microsoft applications" that come with it.

So I have two questions, why can't Microsoft get along with Microsoft? And is there something out there that I can use instead of Outlook? I really want to get back to Thunderbird. Mozilla also has Lightning/Sunbird to use as a calender program, but from what I could find there isn't anything out there that will let me sync my phone with those programs. If only I had an iPhone that would sync with the free for everyone iTunes with whatever program I was using for e-mail/calendar/contacts.